Uzbekistan, again

I am on my way to Uzbekistan again. I was here in 2017 and had an epiphany about the potential of the region. It inspired me to plan a family trip in May 2019, and followed that up with a business trip May this year. The leisure trip was with M and D (J had to go back to serve his internship obligations) and what a glorious trip it is across the Fergana Valley and into historical trading posts of Samarkand and Bukhara. My trip earlier this year was all business and I met with the DPM amd Minister of Finance amongst others and promptly got a project sold!

I am heading there again for the official opening of the office where the Minister will grace. Am flying there after a Global Public Sector meeting from London on Uzbekistan Airways flight HY204 to Tashkent. Not surprisingly it was delayed for nearly an hour because the flight had arrived late by 30 minutes. I know the math doesn’t add up but out of a busy airport like Heathrow, turnaround times is slower and then you lose your air traffic slots. 

London remains one of the capitals of the world but I wonder for how much longer. Infrastructure has not kept paced with the population that driving anywhere within the city (esp. during rush hour takes an hour). No. 10 is now a revolving door with PMs coming and going, mostly because of party infighting. Then there is the low brow distaste that is served on public media and I was appalled with an episode of Naked Attraction I chance upon while surfing the channels in my hotel room. More importantly, the economy is anaemic and the pound has taken a beating as the markets did not appreciate the growth policy the (new) government has proposed. In fact, just before I flew out of London, the Chancellor of the Exchequer was dismissed: a scapegoat for the times. 

On the other hand, the former Soviet Union state of Uzbekistan has leaders who care about the development of their country. No doubt, some level of corruption exists, but unlike in many parts of the world, the leaders I met here are not out to manipulate the population for their own gains. Here, they are keen to learn of the successes and failures of others. 

When I was first here 5 years ago, I took a quick private day trip to Chimgan countryside and encountered people who looked like me and especially an old stall keeper who resembled my grandmother. The Hakka people are said to have originated from the north of China where we had lived as nomadic groups in the Steppes that spanned all across Central Asia. Maybe that is why I felt a certain kinship with this people and are back here again for the fourth time in five years and no doubt there will be more trips to come, perhaps with J in tow as well.

The Uzbekistan Airways flight is really basic. I am in business class, so the seats are bigger but that;s about it. There is no inflight entertainment, the pilots take longer to get to cruising altitude (or to let the passengers know that they are there) and the cabin crew generally just huddle in the galley than walking the aisles to serve the passengers. Reminds me of what it was like 30 years ago in Vietnam. Vietnam has certainly come a long way since then and these central Asia states are indeed the next frontier.

There is, however, some charm to this “old world” operations. I spent the parts of my flight reading. A Paul Theroux travel book no less (and this one is about his travels from Cairo to Capetown which is something I would like to do). And now midway through the flight, writing. Normally, I would have been on to my second movie on the inflight entertainment, a mindless activity that one would promptly forget unlike the more engaging reading and writing I am doing now.

So, there is a silver lining in every circumstance, and in the case of Uzbekistan, it may well be a golden lining! When I was here five years ago, I even encouraged the team to author a report and tell the world the potential of this region. Now, I am back here advising the government to live up to the potential.

 

 

No doubt the universe is unfolding as it should

My dearest J, as I conclude a meeting with some colleagues here, it gave me an opportunity to reflect upon one's career journey

There are about 45 of us and we come from all corners of the world and lead different topics our respective region. I am now the Social Impact leader for Asia Pacific, for instance.

A handful of the folks are in their fifties (like me) and doing this to guide the young and ensure the firm keeps growing and our voices at these meetings are wise

Most of them are in their 40s and then a handful in their 30s. You may call those in the latter group young HighFlyers. However, therein lies the dilemma. Good as they are, they just don't have the experience like the 40, let alone 50 years old have and inevitably their perspectives come across as more academic than pragmatic. Some of them may have peaked too early even.

No doubt exposure to the broader group will help them grow. The larger point I am making though is there is a time and place for everything

By the way, this verse from the book of Ecclesiastes is my favourite and I got it inscribed on a watch I gifted mom for our 25th anniversary. And in your case, though you may not feel so every now and then, the universe is unfolding as it should and your path ahead will be a happy one

I dedicated a poem <If by Rudyard Kipling> to you in recognition of what a fine young man you are growing into nearly a decade ago. Here's another with much words of wisdom.

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be.

And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.
by Max Ehrmann ©1927

Trust your week is going well, especially as it is N's birthday today

Born Great

In his work Twelfth Night, William Shakespeare tells us about greatness: "Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon 'em."

As we live our day to day, we sometimes forget what we are and can be. I feel that this is especially so for you, my dear son, as you start on this new phase of your life. So, allow me to recount for you who you really are and thus help you settle.

As a 10-year old, we had an opportunity to dine together. Just the two of us: father and son. And in that restaurant next to the former SJI (now SAM), you said something quite profound for a boy who has barely lived a decade on earth. You complimented me on the way I inspired you and you even asked me how. I had explained that while I worked hard day to day, I really don't fret over the daily ups and downs. It's always been about advancing towards a vision of a better future and so long as I am still on the path towards that future, the near term pitfalls didn't worry me.

I know you are probably thinking: easy for you to say, old man: your career has been one onwards and upwards trajectory. Well, you would be mistaken there.

Not once, but twice, I took a step back in my career in order to get onto a new job with what I had hoped was a better potential going forward (and I even got that wrong one time). 

• I left as an expat manager from Singapore Airlines (with a free car, free accommodation and cost-of-living per diem in civilised Zurich) to take up a job in Malaysia (in RM! and as a mere consultant - ie not even in management). While I quickly became the blue-eyed boy of the boss, I also realised that I was not in the right firm and shortly after being promoted to manager in Andersen Consulting, I left.
• I joined BCG, because I want to do my work at the boardroom and top management level, but that meant I had to start again as a consultant as the age of 32. The reason why I was prepared to take these steps back was because I knew the step forward from this new vantage points would be even better (even though the potential trajectory I was on - in both SQ and AC - were already quite bright!).

There is a bigger lesson though. All these supposed step-backs were not failures but rather became rock solid foundations in launching me forward. [You know how they say you have reached rock bottom? Well, the rock is a really good platform to jump up from! :-)] 

• In SQ, having worked in operations and people much more experienced and older than myself, I learned how to bring out the best of my team by casting them in right roles and accentuating complementary strengths. 
• Also in SQ, as well as in AC, my postings across SEA (though I felt that I had missed out then), turned out to be one of my key reasons why I worked so well across the region in BCG and eventually became its first home-grown Managing Director of SEA.

So, its not only the vision thing but it is also about allowing yourself the latitude to take a step backwards and also to accept that the episodes that may seem diminished today actually connects to secure a better future. At the end of the day, my son, it is where you land in the future that counts. 

You know well that there is only so much that a person with a mediocre career can brag about his stellar school results from decades ago. We all know of the star jocks/ prom kings/ most popular boy in school who ends up flipping burgers. Being good now is no assurance of being great later... and in fact being ambitious for more now (because you are dissatisfied with the status quo) is a far better guarantee of success in the future.

And that, my son, I know you have spades of. Lee Hsien Loong in a National Day Rally speech called it "divine discontent". The fact that you are wanting more is a symptom of this discontent... but more of what? And this leads us to the question of success. What is it, exactly?

The recent passing of Queen Elizabeth engendered plenty of touching eulogies. Most talk of her dignity and grace in the face of atrocities public (through WW2) and private (her adulterous children and in-laws). I thought about who else history remembers kindly. There's Mahatma Gandhi, Deng Xiaoping, Pope John Paul II, Nelson Mandela, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs - just to name those who lived in the 20th century.  In Singapore, we have LKY. They are all men and women who excelled in their jobs. But notably, like Queen Elizabeth, also paid the price of their families not being perfect (if they even recognised their family members like Jobs famously refused to do at one stage).

So success is not just achievements in the workplace and it's certainly not about the amount of money they made. Yes, Gates was (at one time) the richest man in the world, but Gandhi, Deng and certainly the Pope had far less materially. 

I guess the optimist would character success as attainment of happiness (measured in accomplishments all round - in the tangible and intangible. The ironic thing is you would find that people often do not count happiness in monetary terms but more in sentimental qualities: having the love of the family, friends and even colleagues.

You need to figure out your definition yourself. In my case, being the optimist, I wanted it all: wealth, societal status, values-based family, good relationships with each other.... (the list goes on) and here I have mom as my partner. I couldn't do it all. She helped me with most of the items on the list. Mom looked after the home while I spent 4 to 5 days a week on the road. I brought home most of the bacon and look what she did with it: she built a home. I brought back boards and beams to the household and she endowed it with hopes and dreams. 

And as with all things requiring a partner, there must be trust. And here, a person who is spiritual and believe in the commandments higher than one's mortal needs is perhaps the most trustworthy. Of all my accomplishments, my very best is having met and married mom. 

You remind me of my younger self because you too are blessed with divine discontent. I said to you during dinner that I (together with mom) bought the house that I eventually lived in only at the age of 29. And that's in Damansara Utama in Malaysia. And I bought my own car (a Proton Wira) even later. But I was thinking and planning of a better future even back then.

As you are planning your future, remember that your starting point is already far better than mine: I was a top cub scout in primary school, you became the Akela. I was the troop leader and so were you but you went on to be a President Scout. I was conferred the ASEAN scholarship (for JC) and you got the President Scholarship for Bachelors and Masters degrees. And before all this, before you were even a teenager, you were even already representing the country in APCC and DI! I never got anywhere close to that.

Still, the lessons of your old man are relevant:

1. Have a vision, and so long as you have a path there, do not fret about daily ups and downs
2. To get on to path, you sometimes have to take a step back to propel yourself two steps forward
3. All the roads you have traversed in the past have not dragged you down but rather they connect going forward and actually help become a launch pad for you
4. You naturally want to have achieved across many aspects but know that no one has it all, even the greatest men and women in history. The secret weapon here is your spouse/partner/soulmate who can allow you to focus on your part of the family goals while she focuses on the rest.
5. Your partner should be someone you can trust fully because she shares the same spiritual values as you do. Then the love is not only at a emotional, mental and physical level, it is deeper: you are soulmates connected as one.

If you internalise these five points, then Shakespeare's words will ring true. You start  with two advantages already: you are born with naturally strong attributes and you are in a position to (and in fact expected to) show your abilities. So, fret not, my son. I love you very much and I am very proud of you.

There's nothing you can't do!

Alicia Keys belted this line about the concrete jungle where dreams are made of. There is something about the empire state city that Duke Ellington called the Big Apple, that Sinatra told us that "if you can make it here, you can make it anywhere" and Billy Joel even composed a song about its state of mind.

Being here the last week, I must say the city does have a vibe (and a smell :-p ) that is different from anywhere in the world. The residents are a diverse mix never to be seen elsewhere.

It is a hub of money (Wall Street), consumerism (5th avenue/Madison), entertainment (Broadway/Times Square), food (Gramercy Tavern, et al) and of course education (Columbia, most of all).

There are cities which are financial centres (Frankfurt) or education (Oxford) or entertainment (LA) but never all in one place.

The people you meet, even by chance and the conversations you are part of, or even overhear, from different backgrounds/cultures/accents will certainly expand your mind.

In New York, there is always someone bigger, or smaller; someone paler, or darker; someone brighter, or duller; someone louder, or quieter; someone sexier, or plainer; more experienced, or less; each though is a special human in a unique way. And in this cauldron, so are you, my darling. You will add your own your megnificence to this place and in turn this city will add itself to your tapestry of life.

I started writing this as we journey out of the city, first to Corning and then to Niagara Falls. (Powerful as a natural wonder the Niagara Falls is, its a gift that keeps giving because it also produces the most power for New York state, all cleanly!). So, concrete as New York is, there is a world of wonder just at its doorstep. Whether it is from mother nature or from the hands of a glass blower, there are constant reminders what a universe there is to explore and be immersed in here.

I wish you a wonderful time in New York. Your life journey is certainly more expansive, already far more interesting than your old bean's. I am serious when I said I live vicariously through you. I am so happy that you are getting to live all these new and New York experiences. And no doubt these will be memorable (even the less pleasant ones) for it is the wavy throughs and crests of life's vicissitudes that makes it interesting rather than a straight linear point.

And in the twists and turns of this journey in New York, here are the top three lessons I had gleaned from my own to pass on to you:

1. Separate yourself from the experience. You are not defined by one change; you are a whole person with vast and diverse experiences. Yes, life changes can impact you greatly, and, you get to decide what each transition will mean for you. Remind yourself of your wholeness that has been added to.

2.  Celebrate growth. Through each and every change, you are making progress. Isn’t this inspiring?! Pat yourself on the back, call a friend, journal, make a social media post, get yourself a bagle, or find another way to honor your growth.

3.  Reflect on your own unique journey. Pause regularly to notice how far you have come. Perhaps you do this nightly or weekly or after a big challenge. Regardless, slow down to acknowledge the distance you’ve traveled.

In short, a magical mystery tour is ahead. I said this to you as you headed off to Oxford and look how well you toured that! And now in New York, more magic and mystery awaits and no doubt there will be times when things do not go exactly as planned. Unexpected events are inevitable. In fact they are normal and even necessary. For that is what makes it exciting, enthralling and magical! When that happens to me, I name the occurrence, reflect on it and embrace it as a wave in my life's journey and become more prepared to ride the wave should it occur again

At this juncture, Rumi comes to mind and I paraphrase him,"you are not a drop in the universe, you are the whole universe in one drop". Just like the card mom bought for you. Enjoy the whole universe, my darling.

Photo of the wide open roads we rode on here in New York State. Your road ahead is going to be magical

My paternal grandfather

It must have been more than 40 years ago. Imagine a boy who is keen to be somewhere else. Who can hardly converse in the language/dialect of the old man (then in his late 70s). And he has nearly 40 grandkids yet he would ever so often have breakfast with this grandson. 

We would have two dishes: Pork Pau and chicken Nor Mai Kai. They serve it now in the airport lounge here in Singapore. And every week I would partake of it. 

This week, coinciding with the ghost month (the Chinese version of celebrating the dead), I thought of him. I just chatted about him and his life with my parents last week. I thought of him then too. 

He didn't have the easiest life but he raised his family best he could and that extended to looking after me (with food mainly - from local breakfasts to nourishing exotic foods like ginseng and pig's brains which he would stew lovingly and walk it over in the evenings - mainly for me much to the chagrin of my siblings 😀).

The years were not kind to him. He developed a form of senile dementia and in his case sadly, he could remember the more unpleasant moments of his life and then started imagining shenanigans in the present. 

He lived till a hundred and independently so (by himself at times). He ate moderately (the photo of my breakfast this morning is twice what we would have) and he lived moderately too. A lifetime of frugality ensured that. And more impressively, he remained a man of fierce integrity.

Simple as his life has been, his experiences are worth retelling and I shall - in some way or form. 

For the moment, I'd just remember him fondly and lovingly during this ghost month.

Dream

 I don't think i ever stopped dreaming. Certainly not in the life sense, where i have dreams for my family (i help grow strong wings for the kids while D provides deep roots; or D would say I am strategic and influencing while she is executing and relationship building). Nor at work where I am renowned for the vision thing and retropolating bold moves to reach it.

But this blog about dreams is not about family or work aspirations. Its literally about a dream I had last night. The fact that i remember it is notable enough because i can't recall any other time in the past decade.

So the dream. It goes like this ...

Dreamt I was on a flight and the pilot suddenly gave up. And somehow, though I have no experience, I took over the cockpit and tried to fly the plane. The plane was flying through a city area and as the pilot had left his seat it was descending dangerously close to the high rises. I had to manoeuvre the plane away from the buildings. But given the proximity of the buildings there was no space for me to lift the plane to a higher altitude and it was going to get stuck between the buildings. 

Thankfully there was an incomplete construction and I could just attempt a landing there. Which is what I did and all 100+ passengers were safe. But instead of being celebrated as a hero, I was instead subjected to an investigation by the air safety board. They interrogated me as to why I would pilot a plane with so many lives on board when I didn’t know how to fly the plane.

I couldn’t explain it nor could I explain how I was able to fly so well and did so without any communications with the air traffic control. It was all on instinct and from the heart. And I kept telling the investigators is that the plane is safe and the lives are safe. And that’s what matters.

It is the strangest dream and you know I don’t dream or don’t remember my dreams but this was so vivid, it got seared into my memory. 

Truth is it could be a movie i just watched playing in my mind.

Or it could be my 3rd act i am thinking of and the uncertainties thereof, or my health scare (more about that later). And all mixed up with my inner Han Solo piloting the Millenium Falcon or the inner Bruce Lee breaking conventions.

What's your interpretation?

And was it Van Gogh who said "I dream of my painting and then i paint my dream". Maybe I should do that!

Glory Glory Manchester United

Supporting them before they regained their championship mojo, and then through their winnigest years, and finally being a real fan and hoping they get back on top again... i can't help but feel the victory tonight (or this morning my time) may be a turning point.

Goal in the very last minute of the game made by all three substitutes plus CR7. I asked if this the turning point?... until an old friend corrected me to say its A turning point as this lot has flattered to deceive many times. That, however, is the essence of being a fan: you must taste the highs AND the lows. 

Anyways, here's to Glory Glory Man United