It's all about balance

I came across a LinkedIn post from a colleague who put forth  the Top 5 attributes of leadership.

1 Try and take yourself out of the equation when you are taking a decision for the organisation

2 Always face reality, be authentic but give hope and purpose

3 Don’t ask people to do what you have not done before yourself

4 Surround yourself with strong people and help them succeed – they make you fly too

5 Keep your feet on the ground and your eyes on the stars. But never let your feet leave the ground

As I reflected on these, as I always do when encountering words of wisdom, I found that all these statements have a common trait: balance. Be it about reaching high but staying rooted. Or providing hope but being real. Of helping others and helping oneself in return.

I then also thought if such a balance can be found in one person, or in this case one leader. Can you really take yourself out of the equation when you are one of the, if not the most, key person in an organisation when taking a decision? How does one find the balance. I felt that the trick is going beyond one. The way to balance is to have at least two people (with opposite traits), in a creative, no-malice intended, shared purpose tension.

This became a topic of conversation with D during a weekend afternoon drive.  She cut right to the chase by quoting from the good book. 

"It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a suitable partner for him." (Genesis 2:18)

I find this so true. It is not good to be alone. Having someone with a shared purpose, who means no harm, and yet who holds opposite perspectives (like D being the deep roots while I provide the strong wings) is the answer. By answer, I mean the sought after ultimate state of being. Outside of Christian traditions, the Taoists hold as the central theme the Yin-Yang balance and Buddha himself learned to not go to extremes: the story goes that Siddhartha upon realisation of the suffering of his subjects, left his life of comfort and his family and became an ascetic to seek an end to miseries of mankind. 

He studied with prominent teachers and mastered all the techniques. He followed the teachings of ascetics and mistakenly believed the way to freedom was to completely deny bodily needs and any pleasures. Despite his strenuous determination, Siddhartha's efforts were futile and after some reflection, he decided to accept nourishment and cared for his body and changed the way he was seeking enlightenment. 

The bible speaks of marriage as being a celestial unbreakable bond. That a man shall leave his parents and find his half and what God then puts together shall not be separated, for the man and the woman has become as one.

This brings me back to the point about whether the leadership attributes can be found in one person. The truth of the matter is yes, even if you only have half the attributes my colleague had described. Because you are only half a person. Your spouse completes you and brings forth the remaining attributes. The organisation you both lead (as one) is the family and in that context, living up to all the five attributes are not that far fetched.