For your 2nd act

 “When one door closes, another opens”; you may have heard this phrase before and it is certainly applicable to many aspects on one’s life. But I never quite thought it could be applicable across lives. What I meant was when Malaysia shut its door on me (for the Reciprocal Green Lane travel), J got his approval to travel to the UK to further his studies and M got invited to present to CAG’s senior management and 100 of her colleagues on the findings from her work during the internship. Now, these are wonderful doors to open.

 

The fact that I thought of this quote, and even felt that it was applicable across different individuals, is a good indication of how I think of the two of you in our (your parents’) lives. We see our lives as joined with yours, and that is why over the precious 6 months we spent together we felt free to discuss deep issues intimately as well as intimate issues deeply with each of you.

 

This half year has been God-sent especially for me. Both of you are now in your 2^nd act: young adults now making your own way in the world; and if mum’s and my own 2^nd acts are any guide, we were increasingly focussed on ourselves. I know both of you will be too. So, this past period has indeed been good for us to have had so much of your time.

 

I said to J last night that as part of my job, I size up a situation (or a person) quickly. I needed to do so as I need to absorb as much knowledge as possible before I make a decision. An occupational hazard therefore is I can be judgmental. Combine with the ability to express myself clearly, confidently and also loudly, I do know I can be overbearing in conversations and you both have probably experienced that more times than you care to remember. I am saying this here in this letter because I am not afraid of my weakness. I know it is there and I know how it has developed, and you can sometimes (maybe not often enough) see me trying to moderate that, mostly by using humour and that hearty laugh of mine.

 

credit: eurovision.tv

So, as your 2^nd act stage lays before you in the coming years, doors will keep opening and closing and sometimes you will find that closed doors are just as good because it forces you to go look for opened (and better) doors elsewhere. Many of these doors are inside you, like your strengths and weaknesses. I would encourage you to celebrate your strengths and also embrace your weaknesses: recognise them and work on them just as I am able to laugh at being judgmental.

 

I love you both dearly